The motivation for why a person would be interested in the practice of awareness of reality is probably not basically different from the motivation of why people become involved with the mental health system. One becomes interested because one is dissatisfied with one's life and doesn't know what to do about it.
As with the mental health system, which unfortunately is really the mental illness system, this practice offers a diagnosis of what is wrong with you and a prescription based on your diagnosed deficiency. But the diagnosis offered and the prescription provided are very different from what the mental illness system has to offer.
The mental illness system offers a diagnosis out of the "DSM-IV," based on your behavior and experience which are presumably causing "clinically significant distress" to you and others. This practice offers a diagnosis based on the state of your consciousness, which presumably is functioning in a certain manner with which we are utterly familiar, called by Gurdjieff "waking sleep." This manner of consciousness is considered normal or just the way things are, because it is just the way we are. But according to us, and according to any sane and informed reasoning, it is obviously not the way that we ought to be. According to Gurdjieff, Mr. Nyland, and a significant number of other people, most of whom have no connection with Gurdjieff, and also according to me, the state of our consciousness is the source of our excessive dissatisfaction and suffering. It really is not an escape from suffering that one wishes, but rather reconciliation with life. I am willing to accept the experience of dissatisfaction, which is obviously the reverse side of the experience of satisfaction. I would like to eliminate UNNECESSARY suffering, suffering based on my stupidity. It is my stupidity that I would like to part company with.
"Hit the road, Jack..."
The prescription for parting company with one's stupidity was called "Work on oneself" by Gurdjieff. Sometimes it is called meditation. I am calling it the practice of awareness of reality.
There is a tradition of this kind of diagnosis and prescription in Eastern civilization. Buddha was specifically criticizing the state of our consciousness and prescribing meditation as the crucial element of the antidote. I have some disagreements with the form of the diagnosis and the specifics of the prescription as they are currently translated into our contemporary civilization, but I certainly agree with Buddhism that our problem is the improperly developed or neglected nature of our consciousness, and that the solution is to be found in proper direction of our attention. I prefer to say that our attention should be directed to awareness of reality.
In the West the tradition of indicting and working to repair our consciousness as the solution to our distress is not so articulated as it is in Buddhism. In Christianity, for example, it is as evident as could be that Jesus Christ represents a different kind of consciousness, definitely radically superior, an example to be emulated if we only knew how. Jesus did give indications about how, but we don't know how to follow them. For instance, how to "take no thought for the morrow?" How to "love your enemies," and "turn the other cheek," how to give not only the coat demanded but the cloak as well? Isn't that wildly impractical, irresponsible, even crazy? Mostly people don't even try to "imitate Christ." After all, he was God's biological son, according to myth, and therefore of course he could do things that we can't possibly do. And so the thrust of Christianity has gone in other directions of superstition and even obsessive-compulsive disorder, fueling not only abundant lunacy but also genuine evil, while the truth of Jesus' being and teaching lies neglected.
Our stupidity is not easily dismissed. We are talking about the way our consciousness is. I am certainly talking about YOUR consciousness, which of course I don't experience. Obviously in one sense, and a very important sense, I don't know what I'm talking about. I know that I don't walk in your shoes, and I am also well aware that you don't walk in mine. I am criticizing your consciousness on the basis of long experience in trying to correct my own consciousness. I have become extremely familiar with my own stupidity as a result of trying to repair it. You, at the present time, just live in your stupidity. Of course, you might say that I can speak for myself, but it doesn't apply to you.
In short, you can dismiss our diagnosis and prescription. That leaves you with your life, and with your dissatisfaction. Forgive me for suggesting that we, and therefore also you, are stupid. Why don't you try the mental illness system, like so many other smart people? Join the happy millions ingesting synthetic and alien chemicals on a daily basis to alter their unpleasant inner experiences, and paying a fortune for the privilege. You, too, can patiently wait in doctors' offices for a very time limited review by that professional of "what condition your condition is in." You too can hobnob with therapists, also within professional boundaries and for a substantial fee, to be counseled by someone who, for some vague reason, is supposed to know more about what you should do than you know. Did they study life in a book? At least they have a diploma, and they aren't complaining at the moment. Wait 'til you leave. Then, they complain.
All this herd of victims of the mental illness system couldn't be stupid, could they? And the "providers," who prescribe these expensive remedies, with all their harmful side effects and negative consequences, surely they couldn't be stupid? And how about the rest of us, watching swill on T.V., occupying ourselves with trivia and consumption, "working for the Man" at some job, if we are lucky enough to have a job, which may have very little meaning aside from providing a little money so that we can continue to consume, and of course providing profit to our masters, the capitalists. How about those capitalists, "masters of the universe," surely they aren't stupid, in their childish pursuit of wealth? Surely their exploitation of others and of the Earth, their subordination of all spiritual and intellectual values to the "profit motive" isn't STUPID?
"So on we worked, and waited for the light,
And went without the meat, and cursed the bread..."
Of course, one does the best one can. We are individuals, we are "pursuing happiness." There are many values in life, many goods are not illusory. Yet death waits for us all, and that casts a certain shadow over even the most satisfying pursuits. And before death, if we are lucky enough, we experience aging, and old age. We love spring and summer, and in some ways fall is the best season of all, but then comes winter, and we know that we will never see another spring, even if the fountain of youth flows in our hearts still.
A person finds oneself at a certain moment, more or less alienated from life, more or less disillusioned, disappointed. One's hopes have been dashed. One was naive, but now one is confronted with "growing up," in the sense of beginning to die. And maybe one doesn't feel like beginning to die, not now, not ever.
Probably any problem that can be defined can be solved eventually, given enough time. But the inescapable fact is that one runs out of time. "We grow too soon old, and too late smart." And that is not satisfactory. The remedy is to get smart right now.
Your present state of consciousness is scattered and partial. Awareness of reality is clear and impartial. In your present state you are not impartially aware of your experience. That is stupidity by definition. If you happen to act intelligently in your present condition it is only by chance, because you happen to have developed fortunate habits. But we are actually unable to evaluate whether we or others are acting intelligently because of the partiality of our consciousness. "Father forgive them, for they know not what they do." That was Jesus' generous spirit. But can we pray, "Father, forgive me, for I don't know what I'm doing?" Are we that stupid? For once, I can hear God's voice in my imagination, replying to that: "God damn it, wake up!" It might even make the Lord talk to himself: "Jesus Christ, do they think I made them that way?"
The story of time and mortality, walking the one-way street of our individual life, ending in the grave or these days, the crematorium, is a story. I believe in it, but like all stories, it represents only a partial truth. Reality is much greater than any story, and reality is the whole truth. In the simultaneity of awareness, freedom from time is experienced. In the impartiality of awareness, unity with all that is is experienced. Now is eternal, and in impartiality, now is accepted. The gift of life is accepted only in awareness of reality. "Life is real only then, when 'I am.'"
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